I'm a connoisseur of obscenity, dysfunction, and all things cognitively dissonant.
In school, I studied the history of 20th-century Germany. I wrote my undergraduate thesis on the indoctrination methods used by the Hitler Youth. I think this shit's surprisingly fascinating even though most of you probably haven't ever thought much about it. (Beyond the elusive insight that that Hitler guy was kind of an asshole.)
"Postmodernism"--Benjamin/Habermas/Adorno/Foucault/Derrida/Debord/etc.: interesting and probably onto something. Post-60's American disdain for logic, science, skepticism and other fundmamental aspects of the Enlightenment: stupid and probably to blame for three Bush administrations.
Buy me a drink and I'll rant for hours about the role of aesthetics in mechanisms of social control. I'm a fuckin party animal.
I live in Portland. I hang out in dive bars and strip clubs, when I'm not broke. Indie rock sucks. I drink microbrews when I can intermittently afford to, otherwise it's Natty Ice, or OE HG 800 when I need a little variety. I don't eat meat (unless I kill it myself, in which case it would probably be human). Phish also sucks, and I don't own a single piece of clothing made out of hemp.
Buy me a few more drinks, and I've been known to start dropping lyrical science.
I ski. I'd bet that I'm just as broke/stoned as any of you Hot Topic wannabe-rebel snowboarder idiots, so don't give me any shit.
Music
RATM, Tool, Slayer, Operation Ivy/Rancid, No Commercial Value/Choking Victim/Leftover Crack/INDK/Morning Glory/The Crack Rock Steady Seven, Bad Religion, Dead Kennedys, Minor Threat, Converge, Earth Crisis, Pantera, Sizzla, Anthony B, Jedi Mind Tricks, Eminem, I Self Divine, Immortal Technique, Dead Prez, Haystak, Wu-Tang/Genius/Osiris/Bobby Digital/etc., Brotha Lynch Hung, Andre Nickatina, Aesop Rock, pre-Nissan-commercial Modest Mouse, Isis, Engine Down, Nirvana, Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Soul Coughing, Lifesavas, Bonobo Project, Uprite Dub Orchestra.
Did I mention Phish sucks? Because Michael Jackson sucks, too.
Movies
Trainspotting, Fight Club, A Clockwork Orange, Full Metal Jacket, Apocalypse Now, The Matrix, Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead (remake), 28 Days Later, Ghost in the Shell, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Metropolis (the silent one by Fritz Lang), Belly, Hustle and Flow, Last Man Standing, The 40-Year-Old Virgin (seriously, it's hilarious).
Television
's on, and it sings the same old song/
There's no room left for the truth/
And the leaders claim to try but they've all got shifty eyes/
When you're asking for some proof."
-Dillinger Four, "I Coulda Been a Contender"
Books
Kurt Vonnegut, Nietzsche, Theodor Adorno, Denis Johnson, Irvine Welsh, Ernst Junger, Joseph Conrad, Chuck Palahniuk, Philip K. Dick. Thomas Pynchon. Hegel's "On Lordship and Bondage" (In case you didn't get the other Hegel joke. Haha. The horse is dead.) Plus all that other shit I spent 8 hours a day reading for four years. That was cool and all, I just don't really want to talk about it right now.
Heroes
Ted Kaczynski, John Walker Lindh, that guy in front of the tank at Tiananmen Square and that guy from the Schick Quattro razor commercials. And Maynard, of course.
Reed College
Portland,Oregon
Graduated: 2007
Student status: Alumni
Degree: Bachelor's Degree
Major: History
Clubs: Slayer Hour and the Hypnochronic Bump on 97.9 FM.
2001 to 2005
Andre the Viking's Companies
Marin Conservation Corps San Rafael, California US Corpsmember NRC crew 2 (Corps Respond)
About me: Pillaging the Village since 1983.
"Four blades? You gotta be kidding me, right?" Wrong!
-"I think it's a metaphor."
-"What's a metaphor?"
-"You know, like, choking your chicken. It could mean you had a pet chicken, and you were choking it. Or it could mean, you know, 'choking your chicken.'"
-"Oh, yeah. Wait, I got one: masturbating."
-"Uh, that doesn't work."
-"Yes it does. I do it all the time."
Who I'd like to meet: ...my fate in an appropriately epic fashion. Other than that, if you're into Jedi Mind Tricks, Choking Victim, Nietzschean philosophy, or the writings of Ernst Junger, you might be worth a few seconds. Impress me. We can smoke Camels, drink 40s and discuss the Master-Servant Dialectic.
And no, I don't want to check out your webcam.
no, but i did win a contest for a lifetime supply.
on its own i'd say it was great, but given the circumstances i think it was a tremendous misdirection of aggression and a rather futile pursuit. i mean hell, they didn't even stick a rag in the gas tank and blow the thing up. they just flipped a cop car and thought it made them revolutionaries. didn't do a damn bit of good at correction any injustice and it didn't end any oppression.
You might want to look at "The Black Book of Communism". I think you'll find the credentials of the authors worthy of respect and the research within more than respectable. You might find the number 100 million disturbing. Speaking of stale, the gesture of offhandedly dismissing advocates of liberal democracy's disdain for communism is similarly old hat. You act as if the communist's take on things (if one can divine some coherent program from the tangle) is some preordained truism. Watching some Marcuse-ball-washer or some Marx-fellating-flunky or some Adorno-asslicker or some Althusser-rim-jobber actually debate with a learned economist is a spectacle of embarrassment. Yes, things are fucked up and those ignorant lesser-than-yous enjoy mass culture and fancy themselves happy. Prosperity reaches where before there was deprivation. Suffering declines. God forbid.
erica says "andre the viking needs to get bitchsmacked. i'll throw down, get hyphy in the yay area" at which point i pointed out that her open-handed slap is nothing compared to a viking's axe. figured you should know. she just doesn't understand the chappelle show.
14000/year isn't all that less than i make now. damn hard if you're gonna try and live on your own, but probably doable with roommates. i'll send the corndog pimp (friend of mine from school) a message and see if he has any recommendations for living cheap in the yay area.
Toeing the poverty line for sure. That's ludicrously underpaid for the Bay. Rent alone on the cheapest studios hovers around a grand. Your best bet is to find roommates to share a house with if you're gonna move out there. I can ask around if you're serious about taking it; I have a ton of buddies there. On the plus side, the Bay Area rocks and there's a lot of familiar people to hang out with. Way better than the boondocks of WA. Go with your gut; you'll be fine wherever you end up, hon.
Well, it sounds exciting! And hey, the hick factor only sweetens the deal in my professional opinion. You know I'll drive up to see you wherever you're at if I have the time and $$$. Plus, you'd have all the more reason to need cool peeps up there if it's got Wino beat :) It's not THAT much further away, is it?
How bout dem Vikings? Just spent the weekend down on some Texan ranches amblin' around. It's a good life. Speaking of the good life, dare I plan to drive up? The next couple weekends might be tough, but then work should ease up. Let me check my schedule and let you know possible dates. Peace be with you sir.
whats up buddy i am drunk in espain. come and visit and get the fuck out of minnesota! no jk i went to wisconsin this summer and i loved it, the midwest rocks. anyways i hope u r good hit me up
